Got Joke's?

The Best Joke Ever- that of the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse.
Make sure to read the whole thing out loud, otherwise you may not get the joke. I've put the punchline in black so you have to highlight to read it.

Once upon a time there was a Black and White Knight on a Black and White Horse. And he decided to marry the King's daughter. So he rode to the gate of the castle, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the King and said "King, I would like to marry your daughter."
"That's great, Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse," said the King. "But first, you must complete three tasks for me".
"Oh?" inquired the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse.
"Oh yes," insisted the King. "You must climb the mountain, slay the dragon, and swim across the lake of fire."
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode back to the castle gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the mountain, dismounted, climbed up, planted his black and white flag, climbed down, got back on his horse, and rode back to the gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the King, and said, "King, I have climbed the mountain. You can see my brilliant black and white banner from here."
"That's great, Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, now you must complete my other tasks."
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode back to the castle gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
And the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the dragon's lair, drew his sword, slew the dragon, and got back on his horse, beheading the burning beast and bearing the big beast's beastly brain back with him. And he rode back to the gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the King, and said, "King, I have slain the dragon. You can see the cracked and crushed craggy cranium I carry here."
"That's great, Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, now you must complete my final task."
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode back to the castle gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse rode to the lake of fire, climbed off his horse, donned his fireproof armor, and swam across. He changed back into his normal armor and rode back to the gate, where the guard stopped him, and asked "Are you the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse?"
"Yes," said the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, "I am the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse".
"Well, you can pass," said the guard.
So the Black and White Knight on the Black and White Horse, having completed all of the king's three tasks, rode to the King, and said, "King, I have climbed the mountain. I have slain the dragon. I have swum across the burning lake of fire. Now may I marry your daughter?"
And the King smiled.
And the King laughed.
And the King said
"Yes."

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: A
Litre of low fat milk, A carton of eggs, A Litre of orange juice, A
head of lettuce, A can of coffee, And one pack of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a
drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of
the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk
calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by
this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition,
since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt
and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could
have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the
better of her, she said "Well, you know what, you're absolutely
correct. But how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

Quote :

@Inf@ntrry'

I lol'd, That drunk is a dick >.<

hahahaha

There was a Mexican, a Frenchman and an American on a hot air balloon.
They were discussing about things they hated in their country when suddenly the Frenchmen stands up and throws a loaf of bread over the basket. He then declares: 'We got too many of these in our country!'
The Mexican following in suit throws a piece of fruit over the basket and declares: 'We got too many of these in our country!'
The American not wanting to be left out pushes the Mexican.

haha That was a good one..infantry